Unhappy? Stuck?– How To Make Changes in 2019 Without Torching Your Entire Life
As 2019 approaches, for many of us, it signals a time to reflect over the last year and think about what went well and not so well. It’s the time you ask what you’re longing for, where do you feel trapped and yearning to wriggle free? Where do you feel dissatisfied?
It is also the most popular month for people to finally throw in the towel and quit their jobs. Or chuck their marriage - January 8th is dubbed ‘Divorce Day’ by lawyers because of the spike in couples starting legal proceedings to end their marriages.
I get it – I really do, as I in fact left my job last January, but it was with a clear plan of action of what I wanted to do and where I was going. However, often when I see people firebombing their lives, they actually aren’t really clear about what they want or why – they just feel like they’ve got to the end of their rope and have to do something. When you’ve reached that point, almost any change feels great but torching your life in January, if you don’t have a plan or have really thought it through – will generally leave you worse off (at least for a while) and a give you a nasty hangover when the cold light of day hits. Fortunately, there are plenty of ways to make change without damaging and drastic measures.
For a more balanced approach, I recommend the following steps to my clients when they are looking for major life changes.
1. Get Clarity – I’ve seen many people take a wrecking ball to their lives for reasons they don’t quite understand. Before making drastic and non-reversible changes, take some time to take stock. What’s working and what’s not working in your life. What goals, projects or achievements you want to accomplish in the next 12 months. What areas of your life are you not living authentically? Where do you feel trapped? Enlist a friend, coach or neutral party to help reflect on your answers and challenge if you’re not seeing the full picture.
2. Create a Clear Vision of What You Want – many clients want a change away from what they don’t want or don’t like – but haven’t take time to get clear on exactly what they do want. Often I hear, I don’t want to be tied down to 9 – 5 anymore or have a boss I hate – but without a clear vision of what a self-employed business could be or how it would work. Or it’s time for divorce without actually exploring how you could change your relationship in ways that suit you both. It’s really worth working with a coach or professional to create a future vision of your life – tapping into your subconscious mind to understand hidden dreams. Because you can’t move forward until you understand where you want to go.
3. Create an Action Plan – once you have a clear vision of where you want to go – you can plan out the steps you want to take and how quickly or slowly you want to take them. I’ve known people who change their whole lives in a year successfully and others who are equally happy to extend the journey to their vision over ten years. Either way – clearly outlining action steps, monthly or quarterly goals and committing to taking action is needed to make that vision a reality. Just posting up your vision board on the wall won’t make it come true.
January 2019 is a clean slate. A perfect opportunity to think through the changes you want to make in your life, whether big or small. Take some time to get clarity, create a vision and then think through a plan and before you know it, you'll be on your way to a new future.
p.s. need some help turning your dreams into reality? Book a free discovery session with me today -just get in touch on firstname.lastname@example.org